HunterThinks.com

The best-laid plans of mice and men go oft awry

Posted: 21 November 2014
Updated: 24 January 2018

Why cannot I “just get a job”?

Imagine you had a co-worker or employee who, every day, suddenly became overwhelmed and crawled under his desk. No matter how good he was at his job, do you think it would be good for the workplace to have an employee who is afraid to open emails?

Sometimes I am paralyzed by indecision and other times I experience anxiety attacks triggered by absurdly small and innocuous things.

I feel as if my rational mind is quite slow and I feel confused by things that normally would not confuse me. This symptom comes and goes, and only in May 2014 did I learn it was connected with my PTSD.

Every hour of every day, I must battle through events and symptoms such as above. No task, no matter how trivial, is guaranteed to be simple or easy. If I did not have to cope with my broken emotional reactions and my intermittently-hobbled rational mind, then I could certainly rise out of my poverty and other problems. But my emotions are out of control and my rational mind sometimes refuses to cooperate, so I am stuck in this downward spiral of poverty and mental illness.

Some posts with more details:

  1. A definition of Complex PTSD
  2. Would you hire this person?
  3. A sample of a typical morning in my life
  4. Hunger, the vicious cycle, and the whole is greater than the sum of the parts